Today was a day spent in the trenches. It is weird that I am not in the trenches every day anymore. Trenches = many needy tiny people, or even one needy tiny person needing you all day long. While I didn’t have a baby in the house today, I did have a sick boy. And apparently, that made me very wanted by every tiny person in the house.

I can’t believe how much life has changed in the past 6 years. Just a few days ago I dropped some clothes off at a friends’ house for her little girl who is 20-ish months. They also have a 3 month old baby. (Hi, Annie!) Her 20 month old was teething and had a fever. She did not want to lose sight of her Daddy who went up stairs to rock baby brother while I was dropping clothes off & chatting with my friend. Baby girl wanted to be held all the time. She was just pitiful and crying and not feeling good and nothing was making her feel better. Annie and I had a good talk about how much life changes when you add in children.  What a refining process motherhood is.  And how sometimes you just want your kitchen table to be clean or crumbs not to stick to your feet when you walk through the kitchen. I heard baby boy crying from upstairs and let them get back to being a family.

A slide was in our living room. Enough said.

But honestly, on days like that, I remember when we had visitors I just wanted the visitor to stay. I wanted to be hospitable, and chat, but really, my littles needed me and all of me. And that is when it is sometimes hard. Why?  Because you are being called to sacrifice your wants for theirs. And really there is nothing easy about sacrifice, but love makes it doable and crazy wonderful, though.

So, I walked away from that house and realized how quickly those days pass. And I am not so far removed from them to tell you to hang onto them, to cherish them, love them. I know that you are. I know that you want to bottle up the scent of his freshly washed feather hair. Or remember the exact weight she is when she lays on your heart. Or the first time you heard them laugh- oh to record that!! Whatever it is, I know you are cherishing it.

This feels like eons ago. It was only 4 1/2 years.

Here is what I want to tell you. You can do it. You can make it through today. Today for me was insane. At one point, I had all 5 children crying with the sick one screaming-crying because his hives were out of control. And somehow, I had the strength to not cry with them, but to see what to do. Benadryl for sick child topped off with snuggles in mama’s & daddy’s bed… I’ll be back shortly. Other children, come with me. I sat them on the floor and hugged each of them- told them mama needed to help brother, and they could help me by watching a movie. I promised a snack in 10 minutes, and went back to the sick one. Got snack. Moment over.

Had it even been a year ago, I would have been crying my eyes out with them. Feeling helpless, like a failure, like I wasn’t enough, and someone could do this job waaay better than me. Why was everyone cryyyyyiiinnnngg?!?!  And who can make them stop?!?!?

Here is what I have realized over the past few years.  While I am 32 years old, I am only a 6 year old mom. Meaning, of course I am not 6 years old, but my eldest is a 6 year old. I’ve only been at this 6 years. I’m not a pro, but I’m also not an infant mom or a toddler mom any more. I don’t feel overwhelmed quite as quickly because I’ve been down this road of everyone crying a time or two. I’ve grown physically.

My sweet 6 year old

I’ve also grown spiritually. Getting up at 5 am to spend time with Jesus was only for the holier-than-thou crowd – so I used to think. I would admire how anyone could get up at that time and actually stay awake praying! I tried it a time or two, and would fall asleep with my Bible and wake up around 7. hah!

But, now, I see it as survival. It’s not really even a sacrifice, but a joy.  Okay, maybe *right when the alarm clock goes off, it’s a sacrifice, but that moment quickly passes, and what I get in return sooo surpasses that early hour.

If I’m going to get filled up before my early bird, Crews, wakes up – I HAVE to be out of the bed by 5:15.  I want to awaken to have some *quality* silence with Jesus in the morning.  I’m up with coffee, Bible, journal, Jesus, & quiet. And I am such a better mom for it.  The intentional alone time with Jesus and silence takes care of my heart and soul. {I’ve tried this with the kids awake and watching a show – it is not the same.  :-)}

I don’t do this every day of the week, but on the days that I know Chris is at work and I’m running the ship – I’m up early. I’ve got to be in touch with the One who leads me so I can lead my little shipmates. (I also do not stay up late on the nights before I know I will be up early. I cannot function on little sleep!)  On the days Chris is home, I still try to get in some time with Jesus first thing in the morning.  I just know I have some one else home to watch the kids, so I don’t have to try and get up before they do.

These two different areas of growth- physically and spirituall- have made a world of difference. Not to mention my children have physically grown, so the neediness is not so strong on a daily basis. There are many small independence victories. (Like when we went to Wendy’s the other day and Harper went and got her own ketchup from the ketchup pumper. And then, she got all her brothers’ and her sister their own ketchups…and their refills.. Can I get an amen?!?!)

Young mama, do what you can. I became consistent at getting up early to study God’s word once I was sleeping more at  night.  I still had a little quiet time at nap time reading God’s word.  I would make that my priority before doing anything else at nap time – even if it was a prayer and a little reading.  I held onto the verse: He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.  Isaiah 40:11  I knew if I was giving even a little bit of my time to Jesus, He would multiply it and lead me to exactly what I would need for that day.  Oh and He always, always did.

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Spend time with Jesus. He is your source of joy. When you feel like you are trying to give from an empty cup, know that (if you are a Christ follower), you belong to one whose well NEVER runs dry. He wants to show you His glory, and it is usually in a very unexpected way. Be in touch with Him so that you won’t miss that!

Also, pat yourself on the back for what you have done! So many time our unfinished to do lists shout way louder than our already done list!! Celebrate and realize what you have done! One day I made a list of all I did instead of all I needed to do. After I finished one item, I wrote it down. It really changed my perspective on all I did in a day.

This phase is short. Independence will come. It just happens slowly. But, while you are in the trenches. Know you aren’t alone. And you will soon be out of them.

All my love and a hug and a big high five!!!

Hello June!

The month of May was the best month I have had in a long time!  I decided on a whim at the beginning of the month to do something sort of crazy.

I deleted Instagram on my phone.   I didn’t blog, either.

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(I’m not on Twitter or Facebook. Well, I am on Facebook if you search for me, but only because two homeschool groups I am a part of primarily communicate on there. Don’t be sad if I don’t accept your friend request! :-))

I found myself looking at Instagram when I had any downtime at all. If I had five minutes while the noodles were boiling for dinner, I was on IG. It was crazy. Every free second was consumed with Instagram.

I just had to put myself in time out for a little bit. And instead of feeling the loss of IG, it was like I was experiencing life again! Not only did I get a ton of things on my to do list DONE, I also experienced boredom. Which is actually really good for your soul. And, as a mom, boredom doesn’t last very long. But before, there was zero room for it.

While off of anything social media related, I considered staying off of it. I told my sister that I felt like I was a boat with all sorts of little holes in me that social media had eaten away. I was slowly sinking.  While off of IG, all those little holes were fixed and I felt soo good!

Some things I did while repairing: went to bed really early, made a giant meal plan for a month, cleaned out my entire house, had a yard sale, took naps, started a read through the Bible in 90 days plan, finished kindergarten with Harper, played with my kids, didn’t lose my cool/ have to have a moment, & planned our homeschool summer.  The crazy thing is I didn’t set out to do any of these things.  I just found so many wonderful things to fill my time!

The things above seriously make me sound super human. I am not super human – I am very human and fail and waste time all too much.   I just realized how much time IG stole from me!!

I found the constant viewing of other people’s lives was taking a toll on my own life.

And, I am different now. I needed to take a step back, and enjoy MY OWN LIFE!

The message in church yesterday was on Philippians 4:4-7.  Pastor Mike had it titled Fight for Joy!  This is the familiar passage that tells us not to worry and to rejoice and give thanks while we bring our requests to God.  If we do that, we are promised His peace (that we cannot understand) to guard our hearts!  I loved a few things our pastor said – First he said, when the joy of the Lord isn’t filling you daily – first thing, in fact- it is easy to get to the point of imploding – all the pressure on the outside is too great.   He challenged us to guard our hearts and minds so that nothing on the outside can change what is on the inside.

He also said, when you engage in worship and get your focus vertical (meaning on God), you over flow. You can’t hold an ocean (God’s perfect, fill you up love) in a thimble (you & me.)  We are bound to pour out onto others that way!!!

I’m loading Instagram back onto my phone on Monday, but it is going to come with some boundaries this time.  I want to guard against the pressure from the outside.  I want to do my best to overflow by being filled.

• Only will post 2 times a day MAX- with my main post being in the morning after I have my quiet time. The kids usually aren’t up yet, so I am not taking away from them. My plan is to post a pic of our yesterday.
• I won’t comment until nap time/ rest time. I want my morning to be used as a pouring out time on my kids, and I can’t pour out if I am empty. So I want to guard against IG sucking the life out of me that early!
• I will put my phone timer on for 15 minutes while the kids rest. I will respond to comments first, then scroll and see what my friends are up to. This usually is fun (ahem..why it is addicting!) but, it is amazing how just one tiny picture can make me feel like I am failing at life. I’m determined to guard my heart. If there is a person I follow whom I really struggle with jealousy or feeling like less of person (which I’m sure is not their intention, but more of my weakness), I will unfollow them. If they notice I unfollow them and ask me about it, I will be honest with them and tell them that I have to guard my heart. More than likely, they won’t even notice.  I also have to remember that this is mostly the shiny parts of their lives, they are human and do not avoid the hard parts of life – they just may not show them via social media.
• No random perusing when bored. If it is not during those set times, I’m not going to be on IG.

I hope and pray that these little boundaries will help me stay filled so I can pour out to those around me.

How do you keep boundaries? Have you even considered boundaries like this?

I would like to add a disclaimer to this post :  This is the season of life I am in right now.  When I was up feeding a baby in the night, when I was stuck in the house for days on end due to sick babies…I could have never been more thankful for social media!!!!  It kept me in touch with the outside world.  I am in a new season where my children realize where I put my focus.  They also notice if my phone is in front of my face for most of the day.  So, while I think anyone could benefit from a social media fast, it just may not be your time, and that is ok, too! Just keep it in mind, because I know you will be refreshed!!  

Hey!  I don’t even know how to start this post.  I wanted to jump aboard the blogging train.  I wanted to stay consistent and blog well right out of the gate.  Obviously, that hasn’t happened.

I also started running and I stopped.   Well, not completely, but not consistently either.  And, I would mentally beat myself up about those inconsistencies- how I am being a bad example, and if anyone is ever going to read my blog, I have to stay consistent and keep to the course and plan and execute and do.

But, yall.  I’m human.

And I’m learning I can’t do it all.

There are seasons of life and I’ve chosen good things and wonderful things for this season – my family and home school and cooking and saving money and cleaning out all the junk.  And sometimes, at the end of the day (which is the only time I can blog), I just cannot pour out any more.  I just need my bed.

So, that is why it has been very quiet here.  In the past I would want to say, I’m done – just cut the blog off.  But, I’m not doing that this time.  I am going to aim to blog 4 times a month – one time a week.  New goal.  And then, if that is still too much, I will re-visit that goal and revise it down.

I just wanted to let you know that I’m human.  And I’m learning to be brave, not perfect.  How do you want to be brave?

And here is a picture of Maverick – well, just because I wanted you to see part of his daily wardrobe.  :-)

Happy Thursday, Loves!

A few weeks ago I received an email from a precious friend, Karla.  It was about theproject333.com.  The gist of this project is to work your closet down to 33 items including clothes, shoes, jewelry, sunglasses, purse.  You donate, trash, or box up all your other clothes.  And you keep only the favorite chosen 33 items to wear for 3 months.  I am not really sure what happens after these 3 months as far as the projects’ ‘official’  plans go.  All I know is I had to clean out my closet and try this!

Over the next week, I began to pull items out of my closet that I loved, as well as, items I hadn’t worn in over a year, items that needed to be trashed, and items that I wanted to keep but didn’t know why.  The next weekend, I decided to jump all in.  I pulled clothes out and boxed them up, trashed ones with holes or bleach stains, and sent them on to better places.  I worked my clothes down to 40 items!  I have been wearing my new wardrobe for a little over a week.  And so far, all I feel is more creativity!  Pairing pieces together that I never would have thought about simply because I always go to my old faithful standbys.  I plan on swapping clothes out on July 1 for a ‘new’ summer wardrobe of 40 (or maybe 33) pieces!

After I finished my closet, Chris jumped in and did his.  He didn’t really have a set number he was going for – just a clean out to keep only the things he loves or needs.  Our closet is beautiful!  Our clothing has space in between our clothes now- instead of all of them being crammed together.  I can see all of my shoes.  I have a shelf for a hat, a belt, and a scarf.  There is space and beauty.

After doing this, I had the crazy idea to do this in my entire house!  Ha!  Extreme much? I knew this couldn’t happen over night, but I got a plan.  I started with the boys’ room, then the girls’ room, then the play room.  The play room is currently in progress.  The girls’ room in complete.  The boys’ room is complete, but majorly lacking the ‘polished’ finish that I have in mind.  But, the junk is gone!  I will update with the kids’ rooms.  And eventually the play room turned home school room.

All I know is that house work and chores are already waaaayyy easier to do because there isn’t putting away of all the junk we used to have!

Have you done a major clean out?  Do you want or are you overwhelmed?!  Let me know!!  You can do this!!

Also, for more inspiration, check out un-fancy.com.  Caroline Joy is a dear friend of my sister, and she just launched this website all on building a capsule wardrobe!  She is too cute!

Happy Monday!

Back in 2006, I went to ‘beauty school’ and became an aesthetician.  I worked at a spa in Georgia for almost 2 years, and loved it!  I found out I was pregnant soon before Chris and I were called to move to Tennessee.  So, I stopped working then.  I loved giving facials and waxing.  Helping someone feel better about themselves always makes for a great day!

When I went to school and then worked in a spa I had an amazing skin care routine, and my skin was so healthy.

While in the little babies phase of life, I needed something that was quick!  I didn’t want to keep a time consuming skin care routine – I wanted to sleep!  And I couldn’t spend a lot of money – we had diapers times 4 to buy!  So when,  I discovered the simplest form of skincare, I have been using it ever since!

I don’t remember where I first read about it, otherwise I would give credit where credit is due.  Basically, I use coconut oil to remove my make up and wash my face.  It is crazy and cheap and simple.  To do this,

• put about a nickel- quarter size of coconut oil (or olive oil) in your palm.
• Do not wet your face first.
• Rub the oil directly onto your face.  Even if you are wearing make up.  It feels soo wrong! hah!
• Massage all around – especially your eye area.
• Wet a wash cloth with really warm water and place washcloth on your face.  Allow it to just sit on your skin for a few seconds.  This feels so good.
• Then wipe off oil & make up with a very warm wash cloth.  Some oil will remain on your face.  In the summer, I use just this as my moisturizer.  But, I have really dry skin and find I need a little bit more during the winter.

It feels so weird to just rub oil on your face, but it actually makes sense.  In school, we learned that your skin produces oil via the sebaceous glands. The oil is actually a protective barrier to the skin.  Without getting into more specific skin problems (severe acne, cysts, etc),  the pores can get bacteria in them when your skin is unbalanced, which leads to zits and sometimes cysts (when the bacteria gets trapped).

When your face is stripped of oil, it actually leaves those pores even more vulnerable to having bacteria enter into them. When you are putting the oil onto your face, you aren’t stripping any oil off of your face.  The make up is dissolved by the oil, and wiped off with a warm washcloth.  The protective barrier is still in tact.  I noticed less break out when using this method!

To exfoliate about 1-2 times a week, I use baking soda made into a paste and gently rubbed all over my clean face.   Then, splash clean with water.  Follow with moisturizer.  My current favorite is DoTerra’s Hydrating Face Cream.  Yummy scent and amazing hydration!

I also use Vaseline under my eyes and around my lips.  At least it helps with the dryness, and could possibly prevent some early aging.

While searching to see if I could find the original article I read, I did come across this article that speaks more to combining different oils for your skin type.

I do still use this method, but I am also on a hunt for some anti-aging skin care, too.  (Trying Nerium, currently.  And I have a friend who sells Rodan and Fields)  Until I try it out and find my favorite one, I will keep this one up! Do you have a favorite skincare routine?!  Have you tried this crazy method?!