I cannot even tell you how much New Year’s Day Freaks Me Out.  It does.  Every year.  I think I’m going to be prepared for it, but every year it comes around and I have a mini- break down.  I’m not really sure the ‘why’ behind it, but I kind of just have to roll with the punches.  Any other time of the year I am fine making goals.  Mid February – BRING. IT.  September – my favorite goal making month.  January…OH MY WORD.  What?!  A Goal?  Can.not.do.it.

I think it may be the perfectionist that is in me – what if I don’t accomplish them?  I think it could be that everyone is asking what my goals are, too.  Any other time of year nobody asks me- so I’m not really held accountable.  But, for whatever reason, I’m going to try to brave this and put my goals on my blog.

My words for the year: Love Me.  Sounds kind of selfish, but really it’s not.  If I am to love my neighbor like I love myself…I need to actually love myself – to respect myself & to see myself the way God made me.  So, I keep those words in mind as I write these goals.

Spiritual:

To begin and continue with counseling.  December was a hard month for me.  A lot of processing, a lot of tears.  Not sure if it was from all the cloudy days or the past 10 years just catching up to me (life has been in constant & crazy change for us the past 10 years- married, parent’s divorced, Dad remarried, moved to Atlanta, struggled with infertility, got pregnant, moved to Nashville, had a baby, got pregnant – had triplets!, got pregnant – miscarried, got pregnant – had Haven, survived my first year with 5 tiny children, depression, homeschool, now).  God has been faithful through it all and has sustained me amazingly.  I would be fine even if I didn’t go back and deal with some of these things that have just piled up and not really been processed, but I would still kind of limp along in the long run.  I’m ready to dig in with some Biblical based counseling and heal up some heart wounds.  Also want to memorize this scripture for January: Psalm 139:23-24 and Colossians 1:8.

Mental:

Read Little Women.  I have the CUTEST book of Little Women that I got from Anthropologie!  And, I’m already several chapters in and am LOVING it!

Emotional:

Counseling (see Spiritual goal).  And, date nights with Chris- would love 4 a month, but I think 2 would be more realistic!  Maybe 2 out of the house, and 2 date nights at home after kids are in bed.  It is really important to communicate with him through this time.  I want to draw closer to God and to him as I dig up some old stuff and get healthy thoughts back in my life.

Physical:

Walk and/or run 3 times a week.  Lift weights 2 times a week.  This isn’t so much about my physique any more as it is about my attitude.  I read in Runner’s World this quote: ‘A life without running is a life without a relief valve.’ -The Newbie Chronicles  And I cannot agree with it more!  I am a calmer and more focused mama when I get to sweat!  But, yall…it is SO COLD- 5 degrees right now.  I am going to pull out T25 again!

Family:

Spend one on one time with each kid every day – be it 5 minutes or one hour.  We are all together so much, I really want to connect with their hearts on a daily basis.  And, I want to figure out how we can take the kids on one-on-one dates with each of us.  It needs to be something we can keep up with, stay consistent with, and not break the bank!

Friends:

Meet with and encourage 2 girls that I began mentoring last month.  Have coffee/ play date/ mommy therapy with my people, the Blue Stocking Ladies.

Home:

Get back into the groove of home school.  Consistent daily schedules.  Start teaching the boys to write- wouldn’t mind your prayers on this.  Our first go round of trying to teach this was a big ol’ flop.  They weren’t ready.  I’m a little nervous.

I think I almost have our meal plan tweaked to work.  But, I need to spend a good two hours just focused on that.  I will share it once it’s done.

Work:

This is crazy to be writing this, but I am actually taking this blog seriously. It is going to be my ‘work.’ God has been stirring my heart on it since last year.  It just needed a bit more clarity, confidence, and direction. He has also given me some ideas to work on that I am really excited to share with y’all!  Would love your prayers here, too, because I think these are going to be such helpers!

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I met with Whitney English at the Influence Conference – she asked me what were my BIG dreams?  The ones that scared me?  I had none.  I didn’t think I was capable of dreaming like that – or maybe even scarier was I knew I could dream like that, but would they ever be fulfilled?  Better keeps those dreams quiet.  No!!! She encouraged me to dream Big! Huge! Dreams!  Because those are dreams that only God can fulfill!  Have you written out your dreams?  My big dreams are kept in my journal and in my heart.  I’m learning to open up and begin to take those steps to trust God to do the BIG!  Here’s to 2015!! Sharing those wasn’t soo scary!  What are your dreams/ goals this year?